Baby don’t hurt me, no more

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This happened.

Okay I know she doesn’t say thanks in the movie but I did.

How do you respond when someone tells you that they love you and you don’t love them back. We had an inside joke back in high school to respond with I care for you. Which wouldn’t be lying, but it seems like it would hurt so much more than anything else.

It would have been the sixth year anniversary of being with my ex. It would have been the 14th year anniversary of being with my ex ex. The ex would get mad cause I would forget the date. He didn’t know it was so close to the date of the ex ex that I would get confused. Not we hate each other and I’m sleeping with the ex ex. And now the ex ex tells me he loves me. But besides the fact that I don’t, I also don’t believe him! Because I know that he’s lied about it in the past. When it did matter, when I loved him. And because of that I feel like I can never love him. And because of the ex, I feel like I can never love again.

I just wanted to have fun and have sex and not care. To be free, not exactly like Holly Golightly, but to be free of feeling. Let go of my bitter, cynical heart. Be free of being hurt. With love comes hurt. Especially a love like this, a love like his.

That’s why for now I’ll just reply thanks.

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